The Parish Counsel

In which we groan at the top gags from the Edinburgh Fringe; jump the queue for 50p; consider whether we're old enough to watch Monty Python & Beyonce; review Celebrity Big Brother; and add two breathtaking tracks to the Pretend iPod.

In which we try (hard) to empathise with Morrissey; applaud The Sun!; peruse the rise of Buzzfeed; stand back from the Amazon/Hachette war; review Food And Drink on the telly; and add two singular tracks to the pretend iPod.

In which we examine 'Wreathgate', consider the David Brent movie, turn down a house because of poor mobile coverage, frown on unpaid radio work, watch Dragons' Den, and add two hearty tracks to the Pretend iPod.

In which we listen to Led Zeppelin in the Co-op; watch Chris Evans surfing the waves of RAJAR; question the wisdom of The Sun's 'Satan Boy' story; view a Tulisa documentary; and add two dolorous tracks to the Pretend iPod.

In which we moan about BT & Tesco; cheer for Colin Brazier; calculate percentages at the BBC; uncover the fake Sheikh; review the telly; and add two sonorous tracks to the Pretend iPod.

In which we consider the cabinet reshuffle and the Daily Mail catwalk; there's a pub - it's called The Jobcentre and The Guardian don't like it; bicycle seats on planes; Kirstie Allsopp takes a saw to a tea chest; and two shimmering tracks are shuffled on to the Pretend iPod.

In which we have little sympathy for Robin Thicke; wonder if we need Digital Eagles; calculate losses at The Guardian; watch a lot of television; and add two raucous tracks to the Pretend iPod.

In which we ponder the importance of balloons in day-to-day life; Dolly at Glastonbury; the changes afoot at 5Live & Absolute Radio; review ITV's 'The Betrayers' & add two sweltering tracks to the Pretend iPod.

In which we covet misanthropy; go Yo; consider crime on social media;  the lengths paparazzi will go to get a photo; review 'Police Under Pressure'; and add two arresting tracks to the Pretend iPod.

In which we babble on about BBC Music Awards; grammar; YouTube; festivals; the Culture Show; and add two punchy tracks to the Pretend iPod.